One of my favorite sayings is “if you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans”. Well, I’m sure that God was laughing in hysterics throughout my pregnancy listening to me carry on about how this baby was going to be Jermaine’s. Everyone who knows me heard my plan: I was going to carry the baby for nine months, then Jermaine would carry her for the next nine. I wasn’t particularly fond of being pregnant, and the prospect of going back to mothering an infant nearly brought me to tears. I once told my mother not to worry about getting rid of her crib, we’d just pull out a dresser drawer for this one to sleep in…after all, it’s the third.
Isn’t the luster of parenthood worn off by #3? You always hear third children gripe that they don’t have baby books or even photographs of themselves as babies. I thought #3 was going to be a breeze because we already knew “everything” about parenting a baby; after all, we’d done it with some degree of success twice before.
Somehow my plans went awry. First, this baby is mine. Although her dear father would hold her every waking hour if he could, she makes sure that he can’t by crying whenever he enters her personal space. Second, Jermaine and I brim with all the emotions of first time parents; we find ourselves nervous about SIDS (me) and whether the grocery cart is sturdy enough to hold our 10lb bundle of joy (Jermaine). We have almost every gesture this baby has ever made on film. And third, a drawer would never work for this baby, in fact the bassinet and the crib don’t even seem good enough for her, as she sleeps in our bed next to her doting father every night.
I have to laugh whenever I think of how “un-cool” we are. God is funny; He keeps me smiling & teaches me to expect the unexpected. I always say that this baby has Grace written all over her. God's Grace is amazing; I look forward to all the things that He is going to teach me through Amaya; He has already shown me so much. He continues to use my children to grow me up.
I often cradle Amaya in one arm while I busy myself around the house (loading the dishwasher or doing laundry, ect...). This is a mother's view: - sometimes I even look down and catch her smiling while I'm working away. What a joy it is to be her mom.