Last month Dirt and I had one of our worst arguments ever. It was really bad. I don’t mean to air all of our dirty laundry, but I finally confessed this story to Audra yesterday and she implored me to blog it.
Before I begin, I will say that we’re normally a sane and happy couple and every disagreement that we’ve ever had has been Dirt’s fault in some way shape or form, and this one was no different.
It was Sunday morning (this is not starting out good, is it?). I was ready for church and Dirt was lagging behind (as usual). I was nagging him (as usual) to get his butt in gear. This seemed to be particularly annoying to him, so he suggested for me to go to church without him if I didn’t want to be late. However, this suggestion was particularly annoying to me. Then he questioned why I cared about being late since I hadn’t even been to church in a few weeks. I took great offense to this statement and I stormed out saying that I wasn’t going to church at all! Then I drove off to an undisclosed location and he went to church.
Fast forward a few hours and Dirt tried to make up with me. Sort of. I can’t remember what I said, but I’m sure that whatever it was, it wasn’t wrong. Then Dirt said that since I didn’t go to church, I proved his point about me not caring if I went to church. [me = fuming] I told him that his logic was insane because if I didn’t want to go in the first place, I wouldn’t have woken him up and tried to get him out of the house on time. That's not the behavior of someone who doesn't want to go someplace! I then explained that I didn’t go to church because I was mad at him and didn't want to go to church filled with anger.
However, he thought this was ridiculous, and told me that I was just looking for an excuse not to go. Then I referenced scripture about not going to church when you’re mad at someone and then he told me that I was taking the passage of context. By this time we’re “speaking” VERY loudly and the conversation was VERY heated. That’s when the “Christian attacks” came out, and we were escalating into a “who is a better Christian” realm. “Well, I pray with the kids at night!” “No, I pray with the kids at night!” – mind you, the neighbors can probably hear us at this point. ..Embarrassing...
It was ugly. Really ugly. Like the kind of ugly that takes a day or two to really get over.
All over what? Nothing. Oh the irony, fighting over who was more Christian. Jesus must’ve been real proud of us. I can’t figure out if he was sitting back and laughing or crying at the scene.
So, this goes down as the stupidest argument that Dirt and I have ever had. To this day I still don’t even know what it was about. His lateness? My nagging? His questioning my desire to go to church? The fact that I stormed out of the house and didn’t go? I have no idea. But whatever it was, rest assured that was all Dirt’s fault.
So now that I have bared my soul, it’s time for you to tell me about the stupidest thing you and your beloved have ever argued about.