I read a lot of blogs where the wives portray undying love for their husbands, well I'm here to keep it real, I hate Dirt.
On December 1st, Dirt and I began "a 90-day program" to each drop 30 pounds. We were both at our highest personal weights and it was clearly time to take some sort of action. Dirt picked a program that seemed to suit him (Body for Life) and I picked a program that I could live with (Weight Watchers).
This is where that hate part comes in.
The first week on the program Dirt lost 9 pounds. NINE pounds. I lost 2. Yeah, TWO. And so the weeks passed...I finally reached the 9 pound mark after 7 weeks of dieting.
Dirt would try to hide his weight loss from me, while I celebrated every single pound. One day when I was particularly discouraged, he offered a suggestion, "Babe, why don't you try cutting down on your carbs, I've heard that some people just don't process carbs like others do and maybe that's you, maybe carbs are your enemy".
"Oh really? So I should go on an all-vegetable diet, is that it? [feel the sarcasm]. Since I don't eat meat, if I were to cut out carbs then there would be nothing but vegetables left, I guess that would be an effective weight loss plan, but I'm not doing it. It's not sustainable. I hate you, you...you...you weightLOSER!" Okay, I didn't actually say that last part, but I thought it.
Dirt didn't try to give me any additional weight loss tips after the low-carb suggestion.
So today is goal day - the big 3 month mark. Dirt has lost 35 pounds, and I...well I lost half that much.
I'd love to show you before and after pictures, but Dirt's were taken while he was in his underwear and frankly, Dirt at 240 pounds in his underwear is not something you want to see. I mean, 240 pounds is a lot of hotness to handle and I'm not sure you people are ready for that. I'm going to take his "after" picture today, but I won't be posting that either, because he really is kinda hot now and well, he's all mine.
***here are the before and after pics of Dirt (I cropped out most of his hotness for you):
Oh, and me, I really just look the same.
So we're taking today off and hopping back on the plan tomorrow. This way of eating/exercising really just needs to be our way of life. Neither of us has reached our goal weights (though Dirt is very close), but we're better off than we were before.
Now you see why I hate the man I love. Wouldn't you?